


Canine Persuasion

by Morganna3



Category: Naruto
Genre: 50 Shinobi Theme Challenge, Drabble Series, F/M, Fluff, Humor, Kakashi needs all the help he can get, Pakkun POV, Pakkun is Kakashi's wingman, Romance
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-06-29
Updated: 2019-01-08
Packaged: 2019-05-30 10:43:30
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 17
Words: 4,264
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/15095045
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Morganna3/pseuds/Morganna3
Summary: Pakkun tells it like it is.





	1. Kakashi no Baka

**Author's Note:**

> This plot bunny hit me last night and I couldn't let it go. Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Please don't take these seriously. Theme #21 Baka! Originally published 04/23/2009.

Humans were strange creatures. Take Kakashi… He was a good ninja but failed miserably when it came to social interaction. He'd been mooning over the pink haired girl for years yet kept his distance. She, of course, was oblivious.

Pakkun intently watched Kakashi as the girl walked by. His scent spiked dramatically however he only raised his hand in a half-hearted attempt at a greeting. She nodded distractedly and kept walking.

_Pathetic._

"Kakashi, you'll never get your woman that way."

Kakashi ignored him completely, shoving his nose even further into Icha Icha.

This was ridiculous. The pug shook his head in exasperation. Kakashi was truly an idiot.


	2. Puppy?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Please don't take these seriously. Somehow Shinobi Theme #12 Tadpole turned into Puppy. I did say loosely… (just to be clear, Sakura is NOT underage)

Kakashi was strolling through the park, Pakkun hot on his heels, when he jerked to an abrupt stop. The dog scented the air before peering around Kakashi's legs. It seemed that they'd stumbled on Sakura setting under a tree reading a scroll.

"Why won't you pursue her? I think I need to hear this explanation again."

"She's too young," Kakashi muttered from behind his book.

That's funny. She didn't look like a pup and hadn't for years. Pakkun huffed and ambled over to Sakura. There was one way to settle this once and for all.

"Yo."

She looked up from her scroll and smiled.

Unabashedly, he thrust his nose into her crotch and inhaled deeply.

Sakura's eyes widened, a deep blush staining her cheeks red.

Pakkun turned his head to regard Kakashi, "No she's not."

Before either girl or dog could utter another word, the Copy Ninja disappeared in a puff of smoke.

"Kakashi!" The outraged scream could be heard for miles.

Humans…


	3. Icha Icha Paradise

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #24 Icha Icha Paradise.

Pakkun tracked Kakashi to Training Ground Three. A loud crack echoed through the grounds just as he was pushing his way through a clump of bushes.

_That couldn't be good._

He winced in sympathy at the sight of Sakura trying to beat the Copy Ninja to death with Icha Icha Paradise. Absentmindedly, he wondered how she had managed to pry it out of his grasp.

She noticed him as soon as he entered the clearing and stopped mid-punch. Pointing at him, she wailed, "You even perverted the dog!"

That moment of distraction cost Sakura dearly because once her attention faltered, the sharingan spun and followed the pages of the book flapping wildly in her hand. In a matter of seconds, Icha Icha was back where it belonged and she lay on the ground unconscious.

"You better take her home Kakashi. She'll never forgive you if you leave her here."

Kakashi nodded and picked her up before heading towards the rooftops of Konoha.


	4. Sake

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #17 Hopscotch turned into Scotch which then turned into Sake.

As the smoke cleared, revealing Kakashi's living room, Pakkun wondered why he'd been summoned this time.

"What do you…"

His words trailed off as he finally got a good look at Kakashi. The man's hair was plastered to the side of his face, drenched in what smelled like sake. Pakkun tilted his head to the side. Was Kakashi actually turning blue?

_That was certainly different._

Pakkun eyed him speculatively. "Are you drunk?"

Shaking his head from side to side, Kakashi frantically gestured towards his throat.

"Are you hurt?"

This time he received an affirmative nod accompanied by another frenzied gesture.

"I'm not even going to ask," he grumbled. "I'll go get Sakura and _she_ can deal with you."

A doggy grin twisted his lips as he exited Kakashi's apartment. Sakura was going to be pissed.


	5. Go!

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #9 "Ready, Steady, Go!" turned into "Go!"

Pakkun landed soundlessly on Sakura's balcony and peered through the glass doors. The darkness shrouding the interior and the lump on the bed meant he could safely assume that she was asleep.

_She really was going to be pissed._

Sighing, he scratched at the door before pushing it open with his nose. The instant he entered her bedroom, a kunai whizzed through the air. He watched as it sailed over his head. Apparently, her traps weren't meant for animals of the four footed variety. Chuckling, he jumped on her bed.

Sakura jerked awake and pressed herself against the headboard, another kunai in hand. Her gaze settled on Pakkun and both dog and girl stared at each other for a long moment.

Yanked out of whatever stupor she'd fallen into, Sakura squeaked and pulled the blanket up to her chest.

Rolling his eyes, Pakkun decided to get straight to the point. "Kakashi's not drunk and he needs your help."

"Wha-"

The confusion clear in her voice, he cut her off before she could finish. They didn't have time for nonsense. "Get up. Get your medical gear and let's go."

Her eyes widened as she hurriedly got out of bed and grabbed her medical pouch as well as a few scrolls.

Seconds later, Pakkun raced down the street with Sakura, in her pajamas, following behind.


	6. Brazil Nuts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #26 Potato Chips turned into Brazil Nuts. Hey, they're both salty snack foods.

As they burst through the door, Pakkun nearly choked. The alcohol fumes permeating the apartment were almost visible.

Wrinkling her nose in disgust, Sakura hurried past him and toward Kakashi who was leaning on the couch, gasping for breath. She reached the edge of the coffee table and stopped, staring fixatedly at something on the floor.

Pakkun followed her gaze to a spilled bottle of sake and an overturned bowl of Brazil Nuts scattered across the carpet.

"Of all the stupid, moronic, imbecilic…" Sakura muttered while stalking forward, hands outstretched and already glowing.

For a brief instant, Pakkun was afraid that she was going to strangle the Copy Nin but much to his relief her hands settled gently on his throat. He sighed in content and sat back on his haunches. Kakashi would be okay and now it was time for the show he'd been anticipating.

Sure enough, Sakura started the festivities.

Finished healing, she stepped back and crossed her arms. "I can't believe you! What were you thinking?" Foot tapping, she waited not so patiently for an answer.

"Gai...Bet." Kakashi's horse whisper sounded loudly in the room.

In high dudgeon, her eyes narrowed as she whacked him upside the head. "Gai's idiocy does not give _you_ license to act on _your_ idiotic impulses. Don't do it again." She huffed in exasperation and shook her head. "Eating Brazil Nuts…"

Pakkun was confused. "What do Brazil Nuts have to do with his condition?"

"He's allergic." She smacked Kakashi again. "And he knows better."

Kakashi rubbed his head, slightly chagrined. Looking up, he suddenly burst into wheezing laughter.

Sakura frowned in puzzlement.

Pointing in her general direction, Kakashi managed to gasp, "Your hair..."

She glanced at her reflection in the mirror and froze as she noticed her appearance for the first time since waking. Growling, she finger combed the rat's nest sticking up every which way on top of her head. Finishing her impromptu grooming, she turned to glare at Kakashi. "Says the man covered in sake. I swear. You're worse than Naruto."

Kakashi looked truly horrified.

Sometimes Pakkun wondered if Kakashi did these things on purpose.


	7. Dreams

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #18 Dreams.

An unexpected movement jerked him out of a very pleasant dream involving a sausage stand. What the… The whole bed was shaking.

"Mmmmmmmm… Pink."

Pakkun rolled over as he heard the faint mumbling and stared at the blanket covered lump beside him. Was Kakashi actually talking in his sleep and… twitching? Yes, yes he was.

Burying his head even further under the pillow, the Copy Nin flung an arm out to the side and began kneading the bed sheets.

What was he doing? Pakkun wasn't even sure he wanted to know.

"Sakura," the breathy moan escaped Kakashi's lips before he snorted and then started snoring. Loudly.

Pakkun sighed and turned in a circle several times, making a comfy nest out of the blankets. Kakashi's dreams must be very interesting indeed though only one thing was certain… The boy had it bad.


	8. Thank You

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #45 Ribbon turned into Gift which then turned into Thank You.

Today was Kakashi's day off. He was lazing about, doing nothing more than reading his book and giggling occasionally while Pakkun quietly observed him. Thinking about the nin's predicament with his favorite kunoichi frustrated the pug beyond belief. Perhaps Kakashi just needed a push in the right direction. Kami knows it would take forever for the man himself to get around to asking her out and by that time it might be too late.

Nonchalantly, Pakkun sidled over to Kakashi and pawed at his leg, waiting for him to look down from his book before he began to speak. "You should do something nice for Sakura. Maybe take her out to dinner…"

Kakashi stared at him blankly.

"For helping you the other night," he prodded. "I hear she likes those syrup coated dumplings." Pakkun snickered mentally. He could almost see the grimace underneath Kakashi's mask. The ninja hated those things but Sakura liked them so it wouldn't hurt him to suck it up for one evening.

"Maybe." Kakashi shrugged his shoulders and started to walk away.

"Don't skip out on the ticket," Pakkun called after him.

Kakashi turned, his eye creasing upward in a one-eyed smile.

Pakkun narrowed his own eyes. "Kakashi…"

The crease seemed to deepen as Kakashi waved and resumed walking.

"He better not screw this up," Pakkun muttered under his breath. Only time would tell what the nin would do with the opportunity presented to him.


	9. Ramen

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #50 Ramen.

Rustling bags woke Pakkun from a light doze. He raised his head and yawned before slowly ambling toward the kitchen. Kakashi set a bowl on the floor and filled it with noodles. Pakkun peered up at him quizzically. Why was Kakashi giving him ramen?

"I mixed up the order. Sakura doesn't like this kind. As it turns out, I don't either."

Knowing Kakashi, he hadn't even checked. Then it dawned on him. He stared at Kakashi incredulously, "You got her take-out? You should have taken _her_ out to eat."

Kakashi shrugged. "She's a busy girl…"

Pakkun sighed in exasperation, "All the more reason to take her out. She works too hard. I'm sure a break would have been appreciated. You need to do better next time."

Nodding agreeably, Kakashi flipped off the lights and exited the kitchen.

Pakkun snorted. Those two were hopeless.


	10. Note

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #43 Ink Blotch turned into Ink on Paper which turned into Invitation except it's not actually an invitation because that would be too forward, so Invitation turned into Note.

Pressing into Kakashi's side and tilting his head, Pakkun demanded an ear rub.

Kakashi obliged.

"Write her a note. I will deliver it."

Kakashi scratched the fur at the base of the pug's ear and sighed, "Why?"

Pakkun whipped his head around and stared at him in disbelief. "You still owe her dinner."

"Fine." Slowly the Copy Nin pulled out a piece of paper from a drawer and began to write. As much as Pakkun tried to maneuver his position, he could not sneak a peek. When he was finished, Kakashi rummaged around in the same drawer and slid something inside the note. "Maybe this will satisfy everyone," Kakashi said as he tucked the note into Pakkun's collar.

Exiting the building, Pakkun desperately hoped that Kakashi got it right this time.


	11. Tempura

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #2 Deep Fried Vegetables turned into Tempura.

Eagerly, Pakkun trotted through the streets of Konoha until he reached the hospital. He sniffed his way through a maze of corridors and up a flight of stairs before he found her office. Standing in the doorway, he observed Sakura. She was always so busy. At least today she was sitting still at her desk going through a stack of charts.

She glanced up from her work, very surprised to see him. Suddenly, she looked worried, "Is Kakashi okay?"

Pakkun grinned, happy that Kakashi's safety was her first thought. "He's fine. I have something for you. A gift from Kakashi."

She stared at him quizzically, "A gift? Are you _sure_ he's okay?"

Pakkun chuckled. "Take a look." He moved forward and tilted his head so that she could reach his collar. She took the note and read it silently. Again, he tried to see what was written but much to his chagrin the writing remained elusive. Sakura smiled softly as two smaller rectangular pieces of paper fell from the note. "You seem happy. What did you get?"

Laughing, she showed him the two smaller pieces of paper. "Tempura coupons. At least I like tempura. The ramen he tried to foist off on me the other day was awful. Tell Kakashi thank you. I really appreciate these. I don't get treats very often."

Pakkun nodded. "Take care Sakura." It wasn't perfect but at least it was a step in the right direction.


	12. Hum

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #38 Sing Me A Song (songfic of your choice) turned into Hum because just no, I'm not bringing songfics back and at least humming is musical.

The sun shone brightly on the back of the pug as he ran an errand for Kakashi in the marketplace, a small packet of bills strapped around his neck. If only dogs could sweat like humans he grumbled to himself, panting to keep cool. More spry than his squat little body would suggest, he dodged and swerved to avoid being trampled by the multitude that gathered every Monday to do their weekly shopping.

Through the din of the crowd, Pakkun heard the distinct voice of his favorite kunoichi humming to herself as she walked down the street. Swiveling his head so that he could observe her discreetly, he noticed Sakura was carrying an overflowing basket of groceries with what looked like sausages hanging over the side. He took a deep breath and sniffed. Yes, definitely sausages. Maybe he could sweet talk her out of some. He adjusted his trajectory so that he bumped into her on his way to the kunai shop. "Excuse me Sakura-san. I didn't see you there."

Sakura quit humming and looked down at the pug. Her smile widened when she realized who she had run into. "Good morning Pakkun."

"Good morning to you too. You look like you're in a good mood."

Her eyes sparkled as she laughed. "I suppose I am. I was just doing a bit of grocery shopping," she said as she held up her basket. "What brings you to the markets?"

"I'm running an errand for Kakashi. I'm supposed to pay for some kunai."

"Huh, I wonder how he got them without paying for them to begin with?"

Pakkun shrugged, "Who knows. I don't ask." He sidled a little closer to Sakura's legs and glanced longingly at her basket. "Your food smells amazing. Are you cooking for your friends anytime soon?"

"You're very perceptive Pakkun. I was thinking of making a team dinner. Maybe you would like to come?" She reached in her basket and grabbed one of the much coveted sausages. "I have more of these," she said as she leaned down to offer him the treat.

Pakkun gobbled down his food with gusto. "Thank you, I'll be there," he managed to get out between bites.

Sakura winked at him and stood up. "Thank Kakashi for dinner the other night. He actually showed up for the tempura." Grinning, she started to walk away.

His head jerked up. "What?!"

Sakura's back was already turned as she waved and called back, "See you at dinner next Thursday. Don't forget to tell Kakashi."


	13. Shrimp

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #7 Shrimp. I just realized how many of these drabbles revolve around food. Shinobi eat a lot... Also, I try and post every weekend. However, I'm going on vacation next week and may or may not have the next drabble up by the following weekend.

Finished with his errand, the dog shuffled into the living room and observed Kakashi as he read Icha Icha. The man slouched even when resting, his back bowed as he bent over his book. After the shock wore off, Pakkun had mulled over the information that Sakura had given him all the way back to the apartment. He was glad that Kakashi had finally done something that would further his cause but he was also curious. He certainly didn't look like a person who had just gone on a date with someone he'd been crushing on for a very long time.

"Yo," his gruff voice disturbed the Copy-Nin's reading, "guess who I ran into at the market?" Kakashi peered over his book. "I didn't know you finally went out with Sakura." Kakashi lifted the book back up so that it covered his eyes. Pakkun huffed and jumped on his lap. "Did you pay?"

Kakashi sighed. "We used the buy-one-get-one-free coupons."

"What did you have?"

Kakashi stared at the pug. "When did you get to be such a busybody?" He sighed again. "Fine, we had shrimp tempura."

Pakkun nodded in approval. "Good," he said as he jumped back down. "I've been invited to Sakura's for dinner Thursday. She's going to make me sausages." He cackled internally as Kakashi's eyes widened. "Don't worry. You're invited too. Don't be late." He grinned before popping out of existence.


	14. Knock Knock

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #25 Pitter-patter turned into Knock Knock. At least they're both sounds. Maybe...

Pakkun was excited. He'd been looking forward to this evening all week. He scratched at the door with his claws and listened intently for Sakura's footsteps. The delicious smells of food wafting under the door made him salivate. He could barely restrain his enthusiasm as he danced impatiently from paw to paw.

The door swung open and Sakura greeted him cheerfully. "Hi Pakkun, I'm so glad you came. I made your favorite. Lots of sausages," she said with a wink. She peered over him, "Where's Kakashi? I made eggplant just for him."

Chagrined, Pakkun answered,"Kakashi's going to be late. He had a few errands to run before heading over." The pug hated covering for Kakashi. Especially when it was Sakura. He wasn't sure where Kakashi was but he did say that he would be there.

Sakura sighed. "I suppose he wouldn't be Kakashi if it wasn't something." Looking slightly disappointed, she opened the door wider so Pakkun could come in.

Pakkun really hoped Kakashi didn't mess this opportunity up as he had so many times before.


	15. Fiesta

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #36 Fiesta.

Entering Sakura's apartment, Pakkun sniffed the air once more. The overwhelming smell of food almost made him groan in delight. However, there was something missing. The scent of her other teammates was nowhere to be found. He turned his head to regard Sakura in surprise. "Wasn't this suppose to be a team dinner? Where is everyone?"

Sakura sighed. "Naruto and Sai were called away for a mission." She leaned down and pet the fur on Pakkun's back. "I'm glad I can always count on you. Too bad you haven't rubbed off on Kakashi."

He hated seeing Sakura so disappointed so he did the only thing he could do. He offered her his paw. "I'll let you touch my pads. They're extra soft." He wiggled his paw enticingly.

Sakura laughed and stroked his pads gently. "They certainly are. You know what?" He looked at her quizzically. "We'll have the best dinner party ever without them. Just you and me."

"We can still have a big party. Maybe I could invite the rest of the boys?" Pakkun grinned.

She nodded her head and Pakkun took that as permission. He popped out and back in a matter of seconds. "They are definitely agreeable." The whole pack began popping into her living room, snuffling at Sakura, and demanding pets. Sakura's smile nearly split her face as she began passing out sausages.

After dinner, Pakkun nestled into Sakura's lap. She lightly dozed on the couch as the ending of some movie played on the television screen. The rest of the pack was spread out around her position. This had been the best night any of them had had in a very long time and the company had been jovial. They had eaten the amazing food with gusto until their stomachs had pooched out and they had to waddle into the living room. Sakura also knew how to give the best scratches and she had everyone willingly begging before the night was over.

Much later, he heard a knock on the door. Pakkun nodded at Bull to answer it. The big dog heaved himself up and used his mouth to turn the handle. Kakashi stood in the doorway hand raised mid-knock. As one, his whole pack turned and gave him a much annoyed glare. Kakashi stared into the living room with eyes as wide as saucers.


	16. Lost on the Road to Life

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #3 Tossing a Coin turned into to believe him or not which turned into excuses. Excuses turned into Lost on the Road to Life because wasn't that the original excuse?
> 
> I also would like to apologize for the length of time it took to get this part out. We are moving at the end of the month and every spare minute has been spent packing. The next part may be a bit late too due to unpacking but we'll see. Thanks so much for your patience :)

Shifting in Sakura's lap, Pakkun stared at Kakashi disapprovingly. "Finally decided to show up?"

Kakashi slowly entered the room and closed the door, distractedly patting Bull's head. "You know I had errands."

"Boy, what is wrong with you? There's late and then there's _late_." Sakura stirred as her hand fell into her lap. The pug watched intently but her deep even breathing resumed. He lowered his voice. "Where were you?"

Kakashi shoved his hands into his pockets. "I had to dig a turtle out of a hole."

Pakkun stared at him blankly while Urushi grunted.

"Maa maa." Kakashi waved his hands in front of him. "I also had to hand feed an old lady porridge... with chopsticks."

Bisuke rolled over and glowered.

"However that's not what kept me." His brows knitted. "I had to search the bottom of a lake to find a rare treasure and deliver it to its master. It took longer than expected."

Pakkun huffed. "Your metaphors are terrible. No wonder everyone thinks you make stuff up. Look underneath the underneath my tail."

Edging further into the room, Kakashi turned his gaze to Sakura. "She looks comfortable. We should let her sleep. She doesn't get enough as busy as she is."

"Yes, she does work hard. In fact, she worked hard making eggplant just for you." Snorting, Pakkun rose from his spot in Sakura's lap and jumped to the floor. " _She_ doesn't try to pawn off bad ramen on other people."

Kakashi's face tinged pink. "She made a special dish just for me? That makes me feel -" His confession was interrupted as Sakura abruptly sat up and flung Guruko, who'd been laying on her legs, at Kakashi. Garuko flipped in midair and landed on Kakashi's head.

Still half asleep, Sakura blearily focused on Kakashi. "What happened?"

"You attacked me," Kakashi stared at her incredulously, "with my own ninkin."

Stretching, she sat up a little straighter. "I did what now?"

"You-," Kakashi was interrupted again by an urgent knock at the door.

The person behind the door flared their chakra before letting themselves in. "Both of you are requested to attend a meeting with the Hokage. Immediately." Light glinted off the white porcelain mask as the ANBU nodded their head and shunshined away.

Looking at each other in mutual understanding, both Kakashi and Sakura took off for Hokage Tower. Pakkun, not wanting to be left out, ran after them, while the rest of the pack continued to nap all over Sakura's apartment.


	17. Hokage

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Pakkun tells it like it is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Possible crack and just for fun. Loosely (in some cases very loosely) based on the 50 shinobi theme challenge. Shinobi Theme #8 Hokage.
> 
> I'm so sorry this has been such a long time coming. I've been crazy busy with moving and the holidays. I only have sporadic internet as well but I've been working on this every spare moment. Thank you for all of your patience, the lovely reviews, likes, favorites, reblogs, bookmarks, and kudos! You guys are the best!! Also I wanted to answer a question about timeline. This fic was started over 9 years ago before Pein, the war, Madara, the Itachi reveal, super power ups, and random godesses. In fact, Tobi's identity was only a rumor. So this fic takes place in some nebulous future where Tsunade is still Hokage, there was not another war, Akatsuki is a somewhat mysterious organization with sinister unknown purposes, Sasuke is nowhere near the village, but everyone has still grown up.

Pakkun caught up to Kakashi and jumped onto his shoulder. No footsteps echoed along the rooftops as scenery whizzed past at incredible speeds. Lowering his head to increase wind resistance, he hunkered down for the rest of the ride. They stopped in front of Hokage Tower and Pakkun hopped down from his surprisingly comfortable perch.

Knowing Kakashi would prefer to enter through the window, he readied himself to scale the wall and waited for the command to begin the climb. Instead, Sakura grabbed Kakashi's hand and pulled him through the doors. He watched them start up the many many stairs, Kakashi willingly letting himself be dragged along. Nope, not him. He poofed into the ninken realm and poofed back at the top of the stairs, arriving moments before the others. Promptly laying down, he pretended that he had been waiting forever. He wondered if Kakashi could figure out how he beat him. Kakashi raised an eyebrow at him once he reached the landing. Pakkun grinned his most doggy grin.

Ignoring their antics, the ANBU knocked three times on the door and flared their chakra. They entered the room without further ado and stood at attention, eyes focused on the Hokage. Tsunade slumped over her desk, hand massaging her head. A bottle of sake sat, not so discreetly, behind a stack of papers. She straightened as they approached and sighed. “I need both of your expertize for this mission. The situation is... delicate.”

Both ninja focused their gaze on the hokage's face more intently, waiting patiently for her to continue.

“We may be facing a pandemic. The outbreaks seem to have developed in three different cities, in three different countries, simultaneously. Fire Country is one of those origin points.” Tsunade shuffled some papers. “I need five things from you.” She ticked them off on her fingers. “Find out if this is biological or man-made. Track down patient zero if possible. Figure out how it is spreading. Make an antidote and help whoever you can. We don't want it spreading any farther.”

Sakura closed her eyes momentarily and inhaled deeply, “Anything you need Shishou. What are the symptoms we should be looking for?”

“It starts out like a stomach flu or food poisoning with vomiting, headaches, and fever. Within the week the victims develop pneumonia followed by pulmonary edema and internal bleeding. Individuals may develop slurred speech, swollen lymph nodes, and insomnia. In most instances, it has proven fatal.” Tsunade straightened a stack of papers before looking Sakura straight in the eye, “I believe in you. In this area you are my equal. It's one of the reasons I'm putting you in charge of this mission. Be discreet. Konoha been blamed in some circles for introducing the pathogens.”

Sakura squared her shoulders and nodded her head in the affirmative. She turned to Kakashi, face grim. “I'll meet you at the front gates in twenty. Don't be late.” She nodded to the hokage and vanished in a shower of flower petals.

After watching her disappear, Kakashi turned to Tsunade. “I'll watch over her.” 

Tsunade sighed. “I meant what I said. Sakura knows what she's doing. She _is_ your team leader.”

“Understood.” Kakashi nodded and exited the way he had arrived.

Cocking his head to the side, Pakkun looked up at Tsunade. “Don't worry. I'll take care of both of them.”

Tsunade snorted as Pakkun poofed back to Kakashi's apartment. Someone needed to alert the rest of the pack. He had a feeling that they would all be needed for the mission ahead.


End file.
